Boston, Massachusetts

I spent a good part of my first day in Boston asking myself whether it was really worth all the pain, expense, frustration and train-wrangling. Turns out it absolutely was. Good thing too, or I might have written some very angry letters to Amtrak about two-hour train delays, and to the hostel for being fairly dodgy, smelly and isolating. Also, it would have made today’s stomach bug seem even more horrifyingly inconvenient.

Boston: love it. I spent this morning on a guided tour of the Freedom Trail, this afternoon exploring Harvard, and this evening hobbling around feeling nauseous and eating pop tarts. I don’t think the pop tarts really made me feel any better, but it’s my last night in the US and I’m living on the edge.

I left the hostel quite early this morning, having decided to walk to Boston Common and take in the local sights. The city is beautiful; eighteenth century architecture crops up everywhere, and public gardens are taken seriously. Also, cars don’t try to kill pedestrians like they do in New York, which is definitely a bonus. The whole area is very green and squirrel-filled. I originally thought the Boston Public Gardens were the Boston Common. When I walked a bit further and spotted a herd of tour guides dressed in revolutionary garb in the distance, I realised my mistake.

I adopted a guide (British redcoat) and followed his tour, which started at the Boston Common information centre, and followed the Freedom Trail path-marker to historically significant sites. The most impressive of these was the third-oldest cemetery in Boston, which contained Samuel Adams, Ben Franklin’s parents and Old Mother Goose! (Possibly.) We also visited the site of the Boston Massacre and many other small, pompous red-bricked buildings, all of large historical consequence.

Harvard was definitely a highlight. American colleges have just started for the year, so Harvard Square was full of activity. I took a student-run tour from a sophomore guide sporting a ‘Hahvahd’ t-shirt and a boater hat. He was great fun and full of amazing stories about Harvard history. For example, back in the seventeenth century, a student decided to nick one of the college founder’s ancient texts. He took it home for the night, thinking nobody would notice, and returned the next day to find that the library had burned to the ground. Having in his possession the sole surviving college text, he presented it to the Harvard President, expecting praise and gratitude. Instead, he found himself suspended for breaking college rules by taking the book.

I also learned quite a lot about the traditional Harvard-Cambridge grudge. The most expensive building per square foot in Harvard is a tiny security house by the front gate. Its cost was rather hiked up by the 300 applications that it took for Cambridge to accept its blueprints. Another time, Cambridge was trying to build a firehouse on Harvard grounds, and Harvard only gave its permission on the condition that the new building match the architectural design of the surrounding college. This cost a lot more than Cambridge was happy with. A few years later, as the Harvard Memorial Hall burnt merrily away a mere fifty metres from the Cambridge firehouse, the fire engines took a good half hour to emerge and start fire fighting. When Harvard complained about this, Cambridge gave a public ‘apology’ essentially blaming Harvard for demanding an architectural design that failed to allow adequate room for ladders on top of the fire trucks.

There was also an enormous library dedicated to a wealthy student who had died on the Titanic. Although this student had a first class ticket and therefore access to a lifeboat, he leapt off at the last minute on remembering that he had left his prized collection of first edition books in his room. He returned to find that the boats had left and went down with the ship, books and all. His mother donated an enormous amount of money to Harvard on the condition that they build a library in the name of her son and reserved one room for her son’s ghost to inhabit. Apparently Harvard students aren’t allowed to enter this room. Should Harvard ever remove her son’s name from the library, or use his room for something else, all the books within the library are to go to Cambridge. She clearly had a keen sense of humour.

Oh, and the Harvard law library kicked the Monash law library's butt.

I spent the rest of the day wandering through central Boston, reading my book in the public gardens and taking a free tour of their parliament house (or whatever they call it). Their parliament house is even shinier and more ornate than ours, with murals on every inch of the ceiling and historic artefacts hanging off the walls. The best thing I discovered during the tour is that each house of parliament has its own brass fish mascot. The House of Reps only holds session in the presence of the Sacred Cod that hangs from the ceiling (and is occasionally pinched by Harvard students). The Sacred Cod is a reminder that the House of Reps must never curtail the rights of the fishing industry.


The Senate has its own fish: the Holy Mackerel. :) One thing I found really interesting about the Senate is that all the seats are set at different heights so that the senators see eye to eye.

One final note about Boston: beware of scungy hostels. I left it this morning as a bedbug buffet. While every inch of me is currently spotted and itchy, I did manage to get all my money back from the hostel, plus ten bucks to spend on ointment at the chemist. So if you want a couple of free nights in Boston, stay where I stayed.

(Incidentally, if anyone knows whether I should be worried about all these bedbug bites, please tell me. I got a bit freaked out by the way the hostel people basically shoved my money back at me without needing to be asked.)

Tonight I leave the US – and import bedbugs to the UK.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Philadelphia! Land of vintage shopping and earthquakes, of milling crowds and baseball games, of Philly cheesesteaks and tummy aches.

We left D.C. in the early afternoon and headed northward by our beloved Amtrak system. And oh, how we loved climbing up the Philadelphia hostel’s four flights of stairs with our suitcases in our arms. Instead of doing the obvious tourist trek, we strolled down to South Street – Philadelphia’s answer to Smith Street – and found ourselves a little diner specialising in Philly cheesesteaks. For those not in the know, cheesesteaks are basically baguettes stuffed with shredded ‘steak’ and covered with melted cheese. They were… special. Hey V, at least we tried them!

Lucy and I then spent a good hour wandering through the nearby retro shops. I bought a great skirt for $7. Nice. We then met Matt down the street at the Magic Garden, an outdoor mosaic gallery composed of assorted junk, including bicycle wheels, wine bottles, dolls, plates, and car parts. Matt told us it was amazing. He also told us that the place had peremptorily chucked him out and locked its doors due to the earthquake.

What earthquake? The one that had taken place while we were too busy shopping to notice. Apparently it was 5.8 on the Richter scale at its epicentre in Virginia (where we’d been the day before! Shock! horror! we missed it!)

We then made our way into downtown Philadelphia in order to visit the City Hall and assorted statues of Benjamin Franklin. The streets were crowded with people: students, business folk, everyone who’d been evacuated from their building in case of aftershocks. Everyone was clinging to their phones and chatting endlessly about the quake. There were police everywhere. I’m not exactly sure why. They weren’t really doing anything.

So, bereft of things to do indoors, we wandered through Love Park (apparently a famous park, the one with the LOVE sign) and then tracked down the Philadelphia Farmer’s Market. It was food heaven: fruit everywhere, nuts and dried fruit stacked on the shelves (including intensely green dried kiwi), pretzels, giant cookies, fudge, cheesesteaks (ugh) and everything salty and sugar-filled. We had a lot of fun tracking down cheap strawberries, bagels and cookies.

Next stop was Ben Franklin’s grave. Nearby was the Liberty Bell, which we saw from the outside, and the Independence Hall, which we likewise viewed externally. We were more interested in collapsing on the grass and eating our strawberries and relaxing for a bit.

And then that night: the baseball! It was the Phillies versus the Mets, and it wasn’t really a competition so much as a systematic destruction of the Met spirit. I spotted a grand total of one Mets fan in the entire stadium, and he didn’t have much to cheer about. But for us, it was great fun. Matt clarified the rules for me and Lucy, and then for me again, and then I just listened to the running commentary from the people behind us. Baseball is a thousand times more exciting than cricket, thank goodness, but really made me miss the footy. We dined on pretzels and hot dogs and, in my case, an ice cream the size of my face. I’m not quite obese yet, but I’m working on it.

Next day we headed back to the Magic Garden and got to look inside. Pretty spectacular. And then it was off to the train station, and then – New York, New York!

Savannah, Georgia

Welcome, y'all, to sunny Savannah. It's a gorgeous place, all Waffle Houses and salt water taffy, and the most beautiful houses I've ever seen. The shutters! The countless US flags! The pastel colours!


It was all lovely and quaint - once we'd arrived. Before we managed to get to our Quality Inn (which surprisingly turned out to be fairly decent), we first had to contend with incompetent baggage handlers at the train station. And by we, I mean me. Lucy and I had been forced to check in our suitcases at the Orlando train station, which meant that we were supposed to get them back when we arrived in Savannah. Unfortunately, someone forgot to unload my case, which then led to a car chase (me in the passenger seat of a baggage handler buggy) and a last minute dumping of my case on the platform from a moving train.

Exciting times. I felt like Indiana Jones.

We got to the hostel and admired the Quality, then set out to the diner next door for a typically American dining experience. The menu seemed to be written in a different language, and included such things as (free!) grits, savoury biscuits, chilli (under the soup option; the other soup option was 'soup'), coke floats, etc. After much confusion, I daringly decided on a philly steak omelette with complimentary grits (which turned out to be slimy white stuff) and pankakes. Lucy got a chicken strip dinner, and Matt got a steak sandwich. Boring.



I regretted my choice.


But it was very cheap.

This morning we caught a bus into downtown Savannah and took a street car tour of the town's many historic sites, which included the deathplace of the US founder of the Girl Guides, a Civil War battle site, the First African Baptist Church, and twenty-two pretty little garden squares - including the one where Forrest Gump talked about boxes of chocolates. It's an incredibly picturesque place. And it's worth coming purely for the sweet shop. Mmm.


Lucy and I visited the local mall this afternoon. I failed to find shoes that fit. The highlight was eating a cinnamon sugar pretzel: awesome. I am now very fat. And happy.

Orlando, Florida

Humidity, Harry Potter and heat rash: these are just some of the things I discovered in Orlando. I landed in the airport and soon met up with Lucy and Matt. We bussed to our hostel – insanely good value! We paid $25 each for two nights at a motel of decent quality with a pool and free breakfast. On the downside, it was 35 degrees and humid as all hell, and basically stayed that way till Tuesday afternoon, when it released a good few hours of drenching rain.

I spent Monday in a murky state of jet lag. Not much fun. I’m still not hungry at the right times, though I somehow managed to sleep twelve full hours last night. The others went in the pool while I read in the shade and attempted not to black out with exhaustion. From the patchy red burns on the feet, it appears that I mustn’t have successfully avoided all sun.

Today we went to the Islands of Adventure theme park, home to Harry Potter World. We got there ten minutes after the park opened, and the queue for the Hogwarts Castle ride was already 120 minutes long. Lucy kept our place while Matt and I bought some butterbeer(!) in special novelty mugs(!). Mine was $10.50(!!!) That’s more than I paid for my dinner (at TGI Friday, where the waiters really care about your well-being and bring you home remedies for hiccoughs). But that’s okay, because the mug is totally awesome. I shall send it home to Mel. The butterbeer itself was delicious – for the first few mouthfuls. Then it was sickening. Might have had something to do with the obscene heat, and the fact that it tasted like 98 per cent sugar.


Anyway, during our many excruciating, humid hours waiting in the queue, I got really freaked out by all the signs attempting to deter pregnant people and dizzy midgets from riding. Some unhelpful person told me that the ride was like a rollercoaster; the second person I asked told me it was a simulation ride. So I cheered up.

The ride turned out to be pretty cool. It was by far the best simulation ride I’ve ever been on. You sit down on in a set of seats that move along a track, then get elevated and start going crazy. There was a ‘mini-adventure’ involving Aragog-type spiders, Dementors (for no reason), the chamber of secrets (for even less reason), and a really awkward ‘celebratory feast’ type moment. Pretty much what you’d expect. I screamed a lot. We went on it four times. Awesome.

Hogsmeade was amazing! There were all the shops mentioned in the books (though some were from Diagon Alley – naughty!) as well as a few others, like ‘___ Maestro’s Music Shop’. A lot were just shopfronts, but they had stuff moving in the windows – very cool. Zonko’s was pretty sweet, with Extendable Ears, U-No-Poo and Filibuster’s No Heat, Wet Starts Fireworks. Honeydukes wasn’t as cool as I expected – fairly standard sweet shop with a couple of unimaginative vaguely Harry Potter labels. Olivanders was frankly crap. Kind of hilariously bad. This creepy old man (presumably Olivander, though he seemed to have gotten over all that torture fairly well) got a young child ‘volunteer’ to test wands, and then imparted wand lore wisdom of an uninspired variety.



There were a couple more rides – the Flight of the Hippogriff and the Dragon Challenge – but I didn’t go on either, as they’re rollercoasters. No thanks. Also, the Dragon Challenge was closed. Lucy cried. She’s crazy. She went on this upside down rollercoaster of high-speed variety: insane. I went on some awesome rides, don’t get me wrong. Most were in the Dr Seuss World, and most were intended for three year olds, but I greatly enjoyed them. There was also a Jurassic Park World, a Toon World with a water-rafting ride, and a Superhero World. The water-rafting ride was great while the sun stayed out. You got completely soaked. We also got completely soaked when we started getting pelted with gigantic raindrops. This continued for the next three hours, during which we were mostly outside in various queues. Wonderful. We gave up on attempting to be dry right from the start due to the lingering heat, but this turned out to be a really sucky idea whenever we went indoors and got blasted with crazy air-con.

It was a fun day. I have an intensely interesting tan on twenty centimetres of my leg, starting at sock level and ending at leggings height. Very attractive. And it’s more of a burn than a tan. And I’ve developed a strange rash on my inner elbow and shoulder. On the plus side, Harry Potter World was totally awesome and I ate a free banana this morning.

LA -> Orlando

I've now been in the US for a couple of days, but it feels like a whole lot longer. Time crawls when you're forcibly delaying sleep. Jet lag is killing me. I get hungry at strange times, I'm obscenely exhausted... Not fun.

I landed in LA on Sunday morning (14th), having had very little sleep. I decided to check into a hotel and sleep through the ten or so hours before my domestic flight to Orlando that night. The hotel was expensive but worth it for the shower and the bed. The (free!) shuttle bus between the LAX and the hotel was all I saw of LA.

I flew into Orlando this morning and met up with Lucy and Matt at the baggage checkout. I'd been worried about managing to find these two as I still lack an international sim card in my phone. We hopped on a bus and headed for our hostel, which turned out to be less of a hostel and more of a motel - definitely a step up! There's a pool, and a free shuttle bus to Harry Potter World - tomorrow's destination - and free breakfast!

This morning, trying to fight the effects of jet lag and a sleepless domestic flight, I took off with Lucy to locate the Harry Potter World gates. We made it despite the crippling heat/humidity, and spent quite a bit of time browsing in wonderfully air-conditioned shops. I can't wait till we move up north on Wednesday.

Time to end this: I'm using the free wifi in the hostel lobby, and my eyes keep closing. Sleeeeeep.